if you'd ask if i'm scared.
yes i am, scared as hell. cause i know that just one look might bring all my emotions back.
and also cause conversing with you is enough to make me feel so nervous i wanna puke.
so no, i won't speak of it unless i know i am strong enough to handle whatever may come from you.
but what i really wanted to say was that...
yknow, it would be so much easier for me if you would just end at "Bye." and just continue being an ass. i mean like.. you said bye. thn you said some inappropriate stuff. idk what you're trying to do or what you expect me to say. you should be really happy now. with your girlfriend. so don't say this kind of things to me. it shouldnt matter to you anymore. or maybe you were telling me that you think we made the right decision to end this. idk. About thinking that we know each other and knows what we wanted; i know i don't know you enough cause you dont usually share but i really wanted to know more. ha. sounds so familiar, feels like i've said this so many times. and really, 3 years is not enough to know someone. thn again, how much do we know about each other before we dived into this relationship. you think you don't know me. i think i dont know me. don't know why i'm such a baby when i'm with you. i can be strong. but i guess i just needed you to care. and i dont know why i can be so stupid. i dont know what happened. but bye is supposed to mean bye. so i was just confused.
funny thing is that i can say that you're an ass over and over again. but deep down i dont even know if i believe that you are. cause i think about some of the things and i actually tell myself that you're not that bad. which doesnt help me feel better.
i was thinking about the interview qn; if there was one thing you could change about yourself or your life, what would that be. maybe, just maybe, i would like to change the way we have to end.
funny thing is that i can say that you're an ass over and over again. but deep down i dont even know if i believe that you are. cause i think about some of the things and i actually tell myself that you're not that bad. which doesnt help me feel better.
i was thinking about the interview qn; if there was one thing you could change about yourself or your life, what would that be. maybe, just maybe, i would like to change the way we have to end.
nvm. you just be happy. i'll try to be happier. "2 steps forward, 1 step back"; i'm still moving forward. so its ok. today, marks a new beginning. cause there are no more reasons or excuses left. no more taking steps back. its just going to be forward forward and forward.
but thank you. for giving it back.
/inhale/exhale/
but thank you. for giving it back.
/inhale/exhale/
No comments:
Post a Comment